My Place

I like apples and salad cream. Always have done.

In 1st year for Home Economics we were told to bring stuff in to make a sandwich that wasn't your usual typical sandwich like ham or cheese so I picked apples and salad cream.

If I've been eating them since I was 12 that hardly makes it a craving 15 years later now does it?!

I'm fed up explaining or having to defend my choice, I like the sweetness and sharpness together, it's like eating salt and vinegar crisps with a jar of chocolate spread, it just works and is satisfying.

If I was eating pickles and ice cream would that please them more?

Our twins are Monochorionic diamniotic twins. Not a good thing.

The scan started out as a normal scan last Thursday, we found out that they were identical but they wouldn't play nice for the Nurse and wouldn't lie side by side so she could take a couple pics for us, she did her best and we got some good pics but not the ones she was hoping for. Everything was normal until the end and she disappeared for a min to go get something and she came back with a leaflet explaining what Monochorionic diamniotic twins are and then the scariness started.

Basically one twin could start sucking the life out of the other one. I'm sure there's a better way to put that but it's the easiest explanation.

One twin could be a donor and the other a receiver. The donor twin gives up nutrients etc needed to continue it's growth and development and passes them onto the receiver twin. The donor twin won't grow it'll remain small, and the receiver twin will continue to grow and get bigger. If this happens it means a trip to London for laser treatment to get the blood vessels connecting the twins cut but there is a danger of losing the smaller baby.

They are monitoring me and the twins every fortnight at the hospital so if it does happen they'll be able to start doing what it is they need to do to try and save both babies.

I am shit scared, hubbie is too but he's trying to not show it because he wants to be strong for me.

The next month or so are going to be terrifying as it's in the next month or so we'll find out whether the babies are behaving themselves or if they are starting to do what we're scared of them doing.

Each scan instead of being a joy is going to be horrible incase they tell me the worst is happening.

There is nothing I can do to help them and I feel totally helpless, it's just a wait and see sort of thing and I hate that.

We're having twins.

Complete and utter shock all round and scariness ahead too. We go back to the hospital next Thursday as they weren't able to tell us if they will be identical or not and need to use the bigger scanner to look. We haven't landed back on earth yet after hearing that.

Hubbie is winding me up.

It's my birthday the 22nd and then it ours anniversary on the 28th and he keeps sending me messages saying he's just found my anniversary present and do you want to know what I've got you for your birthday?

He's mean!!

He knows I have a problem with waiting for things and if no-one mentions it it doesn't bother me, but when it's brought up over and over again it's the most annoying thing ever and I'm terrible with patience, infact my patience just disappears altogether when I'm being teased.

Only a couple of weeks to go.....

...Went to bed last night round 9, felt so tired and my head was just so sore, usually sleeping helps the pain but this time it didn't, I work up feeling worse and dizzy as well - what a time for a dizzy spell.

Came into work late this morning thinking it might ease by the time I got to work but no such luck, it's still banging away and making me feel so crap.

What started out as a tension headache yesterday has now turned migrainey. Dunno how I'll manage to get through the day without bawling my eyes out at least once but we'll see how it goes. If it gets any worse I'll just have to head home, no point forcing myself to stay here and making myself sicker than I already feel.

... I got told that this morning and it's stuck in my head all day.

I now have mini jammie dodgers.

Thanks goes to my neighbour for saying that to me when his dogs were sniffing my handbag for biscuits. I'll also carry a few rich tea about with me for the next time I meet the two gorgeous golden retrievers he has. Lovely big dogs with really shiny coats, they are well loved dogs.

I lied to my mother-in-law and told her the baby cardigans were lovely when in all honesty I wasn't thrilled with them at all.

I did the good daughter-in-law routine and everyone didn't suspect a thing.

Some of them are for me but I can't see any baby wearing them, the cuffs were so narrow I had trouble getting 2 fingers through the gap, and though babies are really small I can't see any baby getting their hands through the cuffs at all.

I tried to fall asleep on the sofa but it didn't work, she just kep talking. She can't take a hint!!!!!!